Destroy me...

Lord, I am a weak man, whose heart pains much,
Not because I suffer, but to me a little pain feels large.
I am a sinner oft unrepentant,
so in need of the gentle Spirit's prompt,

I struggle with sin and the deep wounds of emotion,
Just barely oh Father, do I keep my sin from fruition.
But thus have you willed my life, that you would give me strength,
Just enough to overcome my willful bents.

But still I cannot stand my lofty longing heart,
And the struggles that take place within, that so much pain impart.
So I would have that you destroy my earthly wants,
Take away it all, that of me it no longer taunts.

But if these struggles and pains shall bring me to your truth,
Then send them fast and furious, while i still art a youth.
So many days oh Lord, I just long to end my life,
You are the reason I live, through each and everyday's strife.

Destroy me Lord! All that is not profitable,
Because to stem the tide of sin, I am no longer able.
I just cannot wait for that day when heaven's great reward,
Shall come upon me like a dove, and I can lay down my shield and sword.

So Father Lord, i beseech you now,
Let all that fills my hjeart be thou!
For without your aid, I am as good as done,
Without your aid, this race I cannot run!

Today I am feeling quite down and in a lot of struggling. Thank God for that avenue of rest called prayer.

For those that ask why my poems got so anguished ones... HEY!!! Even psalmist got laments. Cut me some slack, allow me mine... (Of course dun expect messianic psalms...)

Lord, I just cannot understand wha goes on inside. I am so weak Lord, even though the pain is not truly that large, yet to me it consumes me whole. Truly Lord, I am one of the weakest men there are, thank you for moulding me.

May I always remember Job's prayer, his prayer at the end of his suffering and he had seen you.
'I know that You can do all things; no plan of Yours can be thwarted.
You asked, 'Who is this that obscures my counsel without knowledge?'
Surely I spoke of things I do not understand,
Things too wonderful for me to know.
You said, "Listen now, and I will speak. I will question you and you shall answer me."
My ears had heard of You, but now i have seen You, therefore I despise myself and repent in dust and ashes.'

Yea Lord... T'is a prayer of a humble man that I speak now... I man who is humbled before you. I give everything. May you just last me these earthly years till i see you face to face...

My dream... To hear "Thou Art Good and Faithful Servant!"
For these words I will take all that will come and I forsake my life.

Let me pray...